- 1. Is necessary being whipped
When I was single, I used to make fun of married men who would blindly follow their wives’ commands and capricious whims at the cost of sacrificing their own independence. But once I got married and had my first daughter…it all clicked. If you want to live in a happy and harmonious environment with your partner and children, you better make some compromises, sacrifices and give up certain habits from your old ‘wild single lifestyle’. Not only because of your partner’s personal desires, but mainly because of your children. Confrontational and uncompromising fathers have negative effects on his children’s upbringing in unprecedented levels. Newborns cannot only easily perceive tensions among their parents, but also fall victims to dysfunctional couples. There are studies showing that the burdened tensions felt by the mother gets passed on through breastfeeding, ultimately affecting the nurturing on the baby’s physical anatomy.
2. I don’t care about my appearance anymore, thanks for noticing the ‘DadBod’ though
Your physique, designer clothes and cologne/perfume are probably priorities when you are on the market or on the prowl; but I have gotten to the point of my life where I really don’t give a flying f$%# about how attractive or unappealing I am to the foreign eye. My priorities have drastically changed and they mostly revolve around meeting my baby’s needs and keeping my wife happy…as long as I am hitting those goals the rest is irrelevant.
3. Don’t ask me to come to your late-night parties
Some of my friends still think that I can drop anything I am doing at 10pm and drive to their last-minute pop-up house/club party 35 minutes away from my residence in North Virginia. Maybe that could have been the case when I was a single lad living in downtown DC riding my bicycle everywhere I’d go. Nowadays my wife and I share responsibilities such as feeding our baby, changing her diapers and putting her to sleep multiple times throughout the night. This often requires planning, being present and constant teamwork so that one of us doesn’t burn out. Even if I do show up to your ‘wild rave’, I’d probably stay for a couple of hours and leave by midnight…remember that now there are people who depend on me 24/7.
3. We are still in a Pandemic bro, I am not bringing my baby over to your group house…
DC is well known for its group houses, where COVID can spread like wildfire if one roommate contracts it; due to the shared common areas, utensils, among other inescapable touched surfaces…so if I decline to come over with my baby to your germ-infested temple please don’t be offended. I am more than willing to meet outside for a BBQ or invite you over to my apartment, but don’t forget to sanitize your hands and take off your shoes before you walk inside 😉
4. I am not grumpy, just sleep deprived
Most of my friends have no idea how little sleep do new parents get, at least for the first 6 months. It is usually intermittent, interrupted and brief. Some new parents are exceptionally lucky with their newborns who sleep throughout the night; but those are just outliers. So if I am not smiling, joking or full energy like always please don’t take it personally.
5. If you come over please don’t come empty-handed
Finances are tight as it is with most of money going towards diapers, wet wipes, baby clothes and putting a roof over our heads. So if you decide to come over just bring a warm meal for us or essentials for our baby…Alcohol and other vices can wait another couple of years 😀